Dealing With Rejection? Here Is How I Overcame Mine

Whether the feeling of rejection shows up for us in a relationship or in business it is not fun AT ALL. One morning as I was still contemplating if to get out of bed or to sleep in just a little bit longer, the content for this blog post was running through my mind and I knew that it was time to share what I know with everyone else.

I have had some unpleasant experiences with rejection and if you are reading my blog for quite some time, you have probably noticed that when I experience something that I don’t like, I am always looking for solutions. When they show up I share them with others so I can save them the journey that I went through. So I’d like to share with you

Two True Stories From My Personal And Business Life Where I Got "Hit" By Rejection And What I’ve Done To Decrease The "Hit" To Almost None.

In 2005 when I was still single while attending HMI (Hypnosis Motivation Institute) and learning to become a clinical hypnotherapist I met this guy one weekend in a motivational workshop. I was really excited about him, and it seemed that he was excited about me too. We met a week after the workshop, went to the beach and had a nice romantic afternoon together. After that we continued calling one another, but for some reason we could not work our schedules to meet. I started to get messages from my gut telling me that I am wasting my time here. He continued to call, to say nice things to me and to try to get together but either he didn’t know what he wanted or he did but was not honest or brave enough to communicate it with me.

The feeling that I experienced was pure rejection. Even though he still called and still courted me with his warm words, I was determined (as much as I was excited about him) to kick him out of my system. I didn’t want to spend my time waiting for him to make any kind of move. I wanted to move on, I was interested in finding the right one.
 

At that time I was learning a new technique at my hypnotherapy school. The technique was about emotional reactions vs. logical reactions. Or, in other words, how to condition ourselves to react to events in a logical way vs. emotional way. It had to do with using the right brain and left brain. As I was learning this, a light bulb turned on in my brain (both left and right 🙂 I went home, recorded my voice walking me through the technique and then listened to the recording imagining the rejection and systematically desensitizing myself from the experience with hmm…(gosh, I can’t even remember his name…).

I listened to the recording 3 times and totally felt that I desensitized myself from feeling rejected by this guy. 

 

The beautiful thing was that I didn’t need to spend precious time talking to my friends about him, making him wrong, trying to figure out what is wrong with me or the reasons he didn't want to be with me. We all know that many times on a logical level we need to let something go, but on the emotional level it’s not that simple, is it? Well this technique that I used really worked!! After only 3 times of listening to my own voice on the recording and my emotions of feeling rejected by him were diminished, I was able to move on, with my studies, my life and starting to date other people. From time to time he would call and found my voicemail greeting him.

When my husband and I were engaged, we bumped into this guy one day. When I saw him, I remember that the thought that went through my mind was: “This guy looks really familiar…” and then I realized that the conditioning work that I had done had really put him in the “forgotten” folder in my mind. That blew me away as well! How powerful our mind is.

Two and a half years later I realized that I can use the same strategy in my business. When I am calling prospects, or when I am calling to book a presentation, some people will say: “No, I am not interested” or even would be rude. So I did this process again. This time I made a wonderful recording (that my darling husband wrote the music for) and I made it available for other business owners, so they can more easily make the calls that they needed to make (I’ll show you in a moment how to get this recording).

So here I am with my list of prospects, calling the first one on the list (it wasn't even a sales call) to invite this woman to a free teleseminar I was doing for the team she was a part of in her network marketing group. Her husband answers the phone and before I even have a chance to tell him why I'm calling, he already informs me that they are not interested. And by the way, that was not a cold call. It was a referral. His wife was a downline of my client.
I was nice to him, we ended the conversation, and I found myself sitting there with my list, shocked, hurt and contemplating if I should even continue calling the other people…who needs this, right? What have I done wrong that I deserve this?

 

It took me about 15 second to regroup!  The thoughts and feelings were gone! I took a deep breath and punched the next number as if nothing happened!!


I give thanks to the wonderful and brilliant ways of the mind and, and more than that, I humbly acknowledg myself for taking the action, for recording it, listening to it a couple of times and being able to quickly go through the emotional turmoil and move on. I am not going to end this blog without telling you where you can grab a copy of this recording. Just click here to get the audio that helped me become rejection-proof.

One last thing. The audio (called: “Becoming Rejection Proof”) is designed at this point for small business owners, network marketers and sales people. I will be working on putting together a similar recording that is oriented for single people. If you can’t wait, I want you to know that this recording will still work for you in the area of relationships as well. All you need to do is when I mention the word: “prospect” you can replace it in your own mind with the word: “partner” or “date”. Feel free to write to me through this blog (by placing a comment) or contact me through my websites if you have any requests or questions.

* * * * * * * *
After you listen to it, come back to this blog and write your comment, ask me questions, or share what happened for you after you listened to it. I am really looking forward to find out how you felt and how you were able to operate differently as a result.

_____________________________________
And until we meet again, infinite blessings to you and may you experience freedom, health, prosperity, happiness and love, every day you are living on this earth.
Much Love,

Sigal Zoldan
Founder of Infinite Realities International- Holistic Healing
Clinical Hypnotherapist, Master Results Coach
& Forensic Healer

Sigal incorporating these modalities in her practice: Foot & Handwriting Analysis, The Grinberg Method, Past Life Regression, Reiki, NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programing) Neurological Repatterning, Clinical Hypnotherapy, Forensic Healing and more. To learn more about Sigal and her work visit www.sigalzoldan.com

DISCLAIMER: This blog and it's content does not purport to offer any medical, psychological, therapeutic, religious, or other professional advice to users. The purpose of IRI programs, audios and diagnostic tools is for Vocational or Avocational Self-improvement. Participants are responsible for their own actions and results. Information provided within this program is of a general nature and is designed for educational purposes only. This information is not intended to replace "traditional" mental health counseling/therapy services. If you have questions or concerns about your physical and/or mental health, please contact your family physician and/or licensed mental health professional in your area.


Comments

Dealing With Rejection? Here Is How I Overcame Mine — 20 Comments

  1. What an inspirational story this is. I think every person encounters being rejected. It’s a part of dating and relationships. You may really feel the pain for several days, weeks or months ahead, however when you stay focused on your primary goal of finding the best relationship as compared to a completely wrong one, you are certain to recover and become all the better.

  2. Meg, I am excited for you!!
    In the next few days you will be receiving some emails guiding you how to make the most out of the audio.
    If you have any questions or if you have some success stories (which I assume you will if you listen consistently) then come back and share, I’d love to hear/read them. I am not sure if you noticed but there is a free guided visualization (if you are selling anything at all) that you might want to download. Scroll back up this blog, you’ll find it to the right it says; “Free Guided Visualization For Independent Business Owners, Entrepreneurs and Network Marketers”.

    Check out this blogpost too.
    http://blog.sigalzoldan.com/4-free-guided-visualizations-here-is-why-should-you-get-them-asap/
    I think you’d like it very much.

    Have fun with it 🙂
    Warmly,
    Sigal

  3. Hi, Sigal.

    I just bought your hypnosis audio ‘Becoming Rejection Proof’ and listened to it. I am very happy I’ve done so! I like your style of speaking, and I found the sound effects and imagery you used to be very interesting and effective. I had no problems at all adapting it almost automatically to rejection in personal relationships as opposed to business/sales. Thank you so much for offering this audio for sale and I appreciate the discount off this page, too.

    Best regards,
    Meg

  4. Hi Sigal,
    Great to meet you through TSA! Hypnosis is wonderful isn’t it? And it’s not what people think it is. Understanding how you can use techniques to overcome upsets and create new habits, and ways of thinking is powerful. That’s when you are really in control of your life. Wonderful post and look forward to visiting again!

  5. Hey Sigal,

    Wonderful post. No one on this earth has come even close to tapping into our mind’s fantastic potential. Even though we have so far to go into realizing what we as human beings are capable of it’s nice to read stories such as yours which clearly illustrate the true power that we all hold, to achieve greatness within ourselves.

    Thanks for sharing Sigal,

    Your TSA friend,

    Kevin

  6. Hi Sigal ~ I can relate to the first half of your post about using a logical viewpoint rather than an emotional one to really understand what is, or isn’t, going on in a romantic type of relationship. The things you wrote about in regard to handling it in an emotional way, which I feel most of us do ~ the spending time talking to friends, trying to make him wrong or trying to figure out if something is wrong with us ~ I know I have done this countless times before. Yet, in the last couple of relationships I’ve had, even though it did hurt to have to end the relationship, the logical side of me led the way, and somehow that made it much easier for me to really move on. Rejection on any level (romantic or business or personal) is never easy, yet knowing not to take it personally, that it’s not always about you, and to keep moving forward is key to continued success in one’s life (and happiness). 🙂 Christine

  7. Sigal,
    Enjoyed your post. It is great that you have found specific conditioning to deal with rejection effectively and it’s wonderful that you are sharing that technique here on your blog.

    I see in a comment reply you mentioned the book “Go for No”. I have recently read that book and find it very helpful. I love that I can treat rejection as a desired outcome. For me that is very effective. I also have Richard and Amanda’s Go for No training course in audio and I love to relisten to it regularly. They also have a reprogramming 30-minutes audio session as well that is very powerful.

    Thanks for sharing your successes in handling rejection..very helpful!

    Dawn and (Dave)

  8. Hey, thanx for sharing your stories!
    Rejection can be devastating and it really can shut you down completely. The world would be a different place if everyone learned how to deal with it and move on.

    Bethany

  9. I loved your post. I have been interested in how the subconscious mind works for several years. I have even made myself some recordings of myself speaking things I want to reprogram. I also use several other techniques. It can be really helpful when something happens that brings our mood and energy down.

  10. Hi Trish,

    I am exited too. “Think and Grow Rich’ is fabulous. I loved listening to the audio version. Many times when I listen (if possible) I get the mind body connection. I sometimes can remember where I was and what I was doing when a certain sentence was said. When I am reading I don’t have that many times. I am looking forward to connecting with you as well. Let’s meet on FB.

    Warmly,
    😉 Sigal.

  11. Hi Sigal,

    I am so excited I found you and look forward to connecting with you more. I have enjoyed studying “Think and Grow Rich” and want to learn more about using the subconscious mind.

    Thank you for such a wonderful website!!

    God Bless,
    Trish

  12. Gayle, you are so welcome. It is amazing what can happen when there is synergy between people (I mean us, as an example). I love working with people, both in giving services and receiving services when there is synergy. It is my pleasure to have a special space in your mind 🙂 🙂 that reminds you to be you, to beleive in yourself and to keep your amazing spirit high.
    Keep it up.
    Hugs,
    Sigal.

  13. Sigal, I really enjoyed your stories and they really hit home, as you usually do with me! I recently met a businessman in HI and began doing some work with him using my cards. Long story short,it was going well and I KNEW we were a great match! Then he dropped a huge bomb, “NO, this is too much money and you wasted my time!”. It took the air out of my sails for sure and I hung up thinking it was that I had done a bad job, or made some mistake…I felt awful! I decided that I probably was in the wrong business…but what happened was I heard YOUR words in my head. “Breathe, you are doing a great job, it just wasn’t right for him…” It took a couple of days to really get over myself, but I picked up the phone and began calling others about my business and when I feel overwhelmed I know that I can fallback on all of the things that you have taught me and that keeps me in the game. Your words/teachings have helped me to stay in the game, even when it is difficult and I thank you. This has been a great reminder and I will purchase your audio so that I will move more quickly from the “rejection” space to the “action” space.
    Thank you, Sigal, you are awesome!

  14. Thanks for your comment Laurie. I agree with you that it is so relevant. As I talk to people I find many times that they know what they need to do and yet the expected feeling (in this case the rejection) is so unwanted that they will not take the action that might lead them to feel that unwanted feeling. But the opposite is true; the more we put ourselves in that uncomfortable position but ready to face it, choosing to face it, the better we become at mastering facing it. Not to mention that when we condition ourselves a head of time the “hit” is so minimal.

    Hugs.
    Sigal.

  15. Hi Sigal~
    Great stories that you have shared and the message is so relevant!
    There are many times after making that one call that goes badly, I suddenly think that they ALL will go that way. Of course that is not the case and thank you for this important reminder!

    YOU ARE AWESOME!!!
    Laurie

  16. Thanks for all the warm words Bunni. Know that you make a difference in my life as well. You are showing up consistently and doing such a wonderful work. Keep it up. I am really taken by the way you are participating in your life, making powerful choices and enjoying the process.
    Much love, Sigal.

  17. To Sigal,
    You are very special. When I am listening to you share your experiences with me or the group, I feel soothed. Your spirit is light and you bring out the specialness of feeling good. Most of all, you teach us how to give ourselves permission to go forward with our dreams.

    There are times when I realize that the fun and joy is getting lost. So you show me a way to feel and look at things to bring it back. Your guidance and teaching is much appreciated. Thank you for always bringing us new ideas , and a new way.

  18. Yes, and so many times we are not aware of it. What we can’t “see” we can’t change. I recently called to book public speaking in a few places. After a while that I didn’t make these kinds of calls I was so happy that my mind was still conditioned. It was very easy to make the calls. There is also a great book that I read a couple of years ago, you are probably familiar with it Laura, it’s called Go FOR No! by Richard Fenton & Andrea Waltz. It did change the way I think about “getting no’s” from people. For some people the reading of the book will be enough, especially when we are dealing with rejections that are related to sales, and for others specific conditioning will still be the way to go. That’s my belief, and that what made the difference for me. Thanks for bringing up that point.

    Stay warm and enjoy the holiday season my dear friend.
    Much love.
    Sigal.

  19. Sigal, this is great! It’s amazing how rejection makes us stop in our tracks and not continue to press forward.

    But, if we have the tools and the mindset to overcome rejection, we will soar to new heights.

    Thanks for all you do!

    Dr. Laura

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