When things are not going according to plan, how do you feel? Do you get frustrated, resistant, angry, sad, or are you accepting, going with the flow, accommodating, and adjusting?
I found that many times it depends on our level of expectations. If we were attached to the results, we may get really disappointed and if we were not attached, it’s easy to move on and forget about it.
Attachment To Results Can Play A Big Role In How We React When Things Are Not Going “According To The Plan.”
For example, you wanted to see a movie in the theatre and when you arrived, you discovered that all the tickets were sold. Yes, you may get disappointed yet, it’s no big deal (and if you make it a big deal, you have some inner work to do) versus you have been trying to conceive for a few years and going through fertility treatments. The emotional and maybe physical pain of not being able to have a biological child is a much greater disappointment; a deep one that can lead to sadness and even depression.
There comes a point that no matter how high we jump, and believe me, I have jumped high as many times as I could, we must accept that it is, what it is. And if we don’t accept it, we will dig ourselves into a dark hole where there’s no joy or light that occupies it.
We May Not Have The Power To Change What Is Happening In That Moment, Yet We Do Have The Power To Change How We Respond – IN THAT MOMENT.
Logically, you may realize in any given moment or over a period of time that it is, what it is: that you are not getting the job, that a vacation is not happening this year, that your mother in-law needs to move in with you, and so forth. So it is what it is and you understand it. But that doesn’t mean you accept it or agree with it. And you can easily become resentful, irritated, child-like, a victim, passive-aggressive, cynical, and other varieties of behaviors that are not on the joyous side of life. But, a shift can happen for you and it must happen on an emotional level.
When We Are Able To Make Peace With Reality That’s When True Transformation Takes Place.
I have worked through my resistances for such a long time. It was so challenging for me to accept things the way they were. I had associated “acceptance” with “defeat” and I kept battling with my own demons, wanting things to be a certain way. After all, I believe they can and I believe they were possible for me to achieve. I still believe in the possibility, however with this slight change: no attachment to the results and having the mind-set that I have control over my response to it and making peace with what is.
And that’s not to say that we can bring a desired change into our lives. I am talking about the present moment, not the future. Accepting it in any given moment and continuing to strive to achieve our desired results. Yes, definitely go for it.
It is true that accepting a given situation the way it is, is indeed work. We’ve got to look into what stands in our way and confront it. In my next week’s article, I will shed more light on why we always keep coming back to the same challenges and how we can stop the repetition.
Accept Where You Are And Take Action Towards Where You Wish To Be.
So if you are in an abusive relationship, you must first accept that you are in this kind of relationship. DO NOT accept the abuse. Only accept that it is what it is, ask yourself what do you want instead and start taking the appropriate action towards healing your current relationship or just let it go.
And this leads me to one of the thirteen Kabballah principles.
"When Challenge Appear Overwhelming, Inject Certainty. The Light IS Always There."
“Injecting certainty does not mean we always get the results we want. Certainty simply means knowing that the Light’s unseen hand is in the game with us. There may be times when we are behind on the scoreboard, but ultimately we can’t lose.”
~ Yehuda Berg from The Power Of Kabbalah. 13 Principles to Overcome Challenges and Achieve Fulfillment.
So when life gives you lemonade, yes, you can make margarita if you choose. If you take the saying literally, of course, and/or you can be grateful, be present, and employ the three keys I shared with you and live your moment in more joy than suffering, in more freedom than pain, and bring more light to your inner and outer world.
Talking about lemons reminded me that I’d love to share with you a quick daily activity I do to enjoy the essences of lemon to bring freshness, taste, feel uplifted, focus, and cleansing into my body, mind, and spirit.
I put lemon essential oil in my drinking water. I am using a high quality essential oil that is safe for human consumption. I carry a little essential oil in my purse and when I dine out, I put one drop of it in my water, only if the water is served in a glass, (never use citrus essential oils in a plastic container or cup!!) It gives a wonderful flavor to the water and it has all these great benefits.
So from now on, every time you smell the wonderful fragrance of lemon, let it be a reminder of this article and the three keys:
- No attachment to the results.
- Having the mind-set that I have the control over my response.
- Making peace with what is.
Meanwhile, many blessings and much love to you and may you experience freedom, health, prosperity, happiness and love, every day you are living on this earth.